Five Minute Friday: Again

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Today is my first time participating in a "Five Minute Friday" blog hop.  This week's word is: Again.  I have 5 minutes to write the first thoughts that come into my head, unedited and unscripted. Here we go.

This morning I drove to the ocean. Again.

I keep finding myself here.  It seems to call me throughout the week, saying "come."  I used to not like the ocean; I am a "woodsy" girl myself.  The ocean seemed so windy, so salty, and made my hair do crazy things.

But lately I find myself driving there, again and again.

The rain drizzled and the water was clear blue. I saw sea lions playing. No whales or dolphins today, who were probably seeking shelter from the pelting rain above them.

The weather and the water matched my mood.  Cloudy, overcast, slightly raining.

I have been discouraged lately.  Everytime I see someone else publish a book, it reminds me that mine is still sitting here.  I am working hard but seeming to go nowhere.  Doors are opening still, but I am experiencing writer's block, and worker's block, and mommy's block- and whatever else kind of "block" there is.  I feel a little stuck.  I wonder if this dream will ever become a reality, or will I fail as I have failed in many other ways in my life?

And yet when I sit at the ocean, I feel a calmness wash over me. I look at the vast expanse and am reminded of God's sovereignty, that He created it all.  And He reminds me to get back up. Again.

 

Top 10 Reasons I Love Downton Abbey

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Last Saturday I had the opportunity to attend the red carpet premier of Downton Abbey on the Queen Mary in Long Beach, CA.  (The red carpet part?  Yeah, that was so short that we didn't even know we walked on it) :)

My sister Lauren and I

Alaina, Lauren, Me, and Michelle 

It was surreal to be on the Queen Mary and take a step back in time to join with about 250-300 other fans to watch the first episode of the new season.  We were treated to snacks, coffee and a "spot of tea," as well as the first hour of the episode.  Some people were dressed in period costumes which only added to the fun.

Downton Abbey has become a huge hit, and everywhere you go you will hear people talking about it.  I am normally not a fan of period pieces, but this one is an exception. Here are my top 10 reasons for loving Downton Abbey:

1) Her.

I can only hope to be as classy one day! :) (An image from Season 3, episode 1 - hilarious)

2) Lady Sybil, who fought against tradition and married the chauffeur. She eloped with him and they came back together for her sister's wedding, and now the family struggles to accept this new husband who is no longer an employee, but a family member.

3) Lady Mary and Matthew - another classic love story of a distinguished lady marrying a man who fights against upper class divisions.  He desires to live a simple life, much to his bride's dismay. Their on-again, off-again relationship kept viewers in suspense until they finally tied-the-knot this past episode.

4) Lady Edith. Ah, the black sheep of the family.  She is made fun of in TV-spoofs, but she really does have a heart.  In love with a man 25 years older than she (against her father's wishes), we are still rooting for Lady Edith to find love this season.

5) Lord Grantham.  He is not without his weaknesses, but this man is a huge teddy-bear.  He is the father of the 3 girls, a husband to Cora, Countess of Grantham, and the son of Violet, Countess of Grantham (see image #1).

And then who can forget the Downton Staff, who have enough drama to form their own spin-off show?

6) The love story of John and Anna.  Did he really kill his ex-wife?  Say it cannot be!  We love John Bates!

7) Mr. Carson, the Head Butler. I don't know....everytime I look at him he reminds me of a faithful old dog.  He is loyal to the end.

8)  All the staffers we DON'T like, yet keep us rooting for the ones we DO like.

9) The dog.  We don't see him much, but he's a yellow lab. What's not to love?

10) The fans. Oh, the fans of this show.  We are a loyal bunch, and we stick together.  We promote the heck out of this show (for free).  I truly think this is one of the best dramas that has been on TV in years (except for Parenthood, of course).  If you are a fan of Downton Abbey, leave a comment and let me know your favorite character, or something you love about the show that I may have missed.

If you are a loyal fan, you will want to check out this fun article called "Downton Abbey Stars On-Screen vs. Off-Screen" - some of the differences are amazing! 

For those who haven't tuned in yet, there is still time!  Seasons 1 and 2 are on PBS and on Hulu. Season 3 airs on PBS on Sunday nights at 9/8c. 

When the World is Falling Apart

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Sometimes, when we hear of something terrible happening in the world, we want to know more.  We want information. We want to know why. We want to empathize with the people who are suffering.

So we turn on the television, the news, the radio - anything where we can get the latest updates, to stay informed, to be aware.

Our hearts ache, we long to help, we wish we were closer to offer a loving embrace and some assistance, even in a small way.

 ABC News

But it can also be distracting.  The very things we turn to in order to help us feel connected can turn against us. The pictures can get lodged in our minds, the cries for help can haunt us at night.  And we begin to fear....and to fear....and to fear.

How we respond is crucial, for little eyes are watching us. Little eyes that trust, that believe in good, that want to live life with freedom.

So is the answer to shut everything off and just shelter our children, and never let them know of the evil going on outside?  Would that be helpful?

As tempted as I am to turn on the news (because I am an information addict), the house is eerily quiet today.  My children do not know what has happened yet.  They are still at school, hearing stories and reading books, their minds in far-away lands of fairy tales and make believe.

What I do with this situation will also stick in their minds forever. How do I tell them?  How much should I say?  Should I show them the truth?

Yet I know that as a mother, it is my job to guard their hearts, to protect them, to shield them from evil as long as I possibly can.

So today, while they are 5 and 7, I will prayerfully consider these things. I do not want to instill fear in my children, but faith that the world can still be good, that people can still be trusted, that God will protect them in their comings and goings.  There will still be many occasions for them to learn about evil in the world. But for today, I may just shield them one more time.

And maybe, with the silence of the television and news being off, I can use that time to pray, because often I spend more time getting informed than I actually do praying for the situation.

If your children already know of this situation or you plan on sharing it with them, head over to Beth's blog at Home Stories A to Z to read her advice on How to Talk to Your Kids About School Shootings. As a former school counselor, she knows.

25 Days of Christmas Activities!!!

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Every year I try to think of 25 fun activities for the boys to do before Christmas, and this year I went on the hunt for some new ideas. On Pinterest you can find a ton of cute ways for the kids to discover what the fun activity will be for the day, but we use our tried-and-true Christmas tree advent calendar that I got at Starbucks years and years ago.

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Here is our list for this year:


Decorate for Christmas and put up the lights!!!

Eat a red and green dinner

Read a Christmas book by flashlight

Make a treat to take to the neighbors

Read the story of Jesus’ birth

Have dinner in front of the Christmas tree and watch a movie

Have hot chocolate

Go see the Christmas lights

Have Christmas breakfast for dinner!

Make a Christmas craft

Make Christmas cookies

Camp out under the tree!!

Buy Christmas gifts for each other!  $10 limit

Movie night

Open presents with family!

Newport Beach Boat Parade!!

Go get frozen yogurt!

Visit with Santa on the Santa float and get a candy cane!!!

Make a gingerbread house

Go to Grandma & Grandpa's house

Christmas Day - Celebrate Jesus!

Stay up late 

Go to the mall and ride the Christmas train

Go out to eat

Have a Christmas play-date with friends

In each little box I place one of the items on a slip of paper, along with 2 Hershey's kisses (one for each boy) and a Scripture reading to read before bed (still working on those though).

What ideas would you put on your list?

10 Minutes for You

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If I were to ask you, "What did you do for yourself today?"  What would you say?

As mothers we have often a hard time with that question. Doing something for ourselves might make us feel like we're being selfish or not taking care of the kids or not caring about their needs.  Yet this is our full-time job, caring for others, and just as if it was a paid job, we need to take breaks throughout the day.

What you do for yourself might vary depending on the age of your child.  Do you love to exercise and can't find time for it?  When your baby is a newborn or toddler, that might not be something you get to do everyday, but as he grows older, his needs will change and you might find yourself fitting it in somewhere.  Do you love to scrapbook?  Maybe you cannot do that every single day, but you can schedule in a time once a month to do it because it brings you joy. The key is to plan moments for yourself and not feel guilty about it.

Although most of us would likely say that we do something fun for ourselves once or twice a month, I encourage you to daily find something you look forward to - something that will relax you, bring you joy, or be an outlet.  Before you tune me out for being impractical, let me state that I understand it is hard to find time, especially under certain circumstances - if you work, have more than one child, homeschool, etc...  But if you cannot find at least 5 minutes for you at least twice a day, some priorities need to change.

Whenever we do have small pockets of time, we usually try to accomplish something. Today I had 10 minutes and had to call my insurance to work out an issue.  Total pain.  But later on I found 10 minutes again, and this is what I did:

I went in my room, turned off the light, and laid in the dark.  It was quiet.  I was alone. Nobody was jumping on me or asking me to make them a snack for the 100th time.  I could actually hear myself breathing.  After 10 minutes, I got up and emerged from my bedroom with a clearer head and a little more energy.  (You might wonder what my boys were doing during that 10 minutes - they were watching a video at that moment - hallelujah!) :)

Today, what is something small that you can do for yourself with a small pocket of time?

Maybe you would read your Bible.
Or have a cup of coffee.
Perhaps you would take a quick nap, or rest for a bit.
Maybe you would read a magazine article.
Or listen to music
Maybe you'd even (gasp) exercise
Or go outside for a few minutes to get some fresh air

Only you can find what works for you.

But please don't do these things and think it will bring you rest:

Peruse the internet
Email someone
Read a blog
Listen to talk radio
Look for jobs
Write a blog post :)

Because hey, I'm all for enjoying time online, reading (and writing) blogs, but it most likely won't bring you rest or joy.  Find something creative that you can do that will allow you to stop and breathe without adding more noise to your already crowded mind.

So what would you do right now if you had 10 minutes?

Who Can You Believe In?

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Over lunch with a friend, she had tears in her eyes as she told me how one of her dreams had started to come true - a ministry she had told me about a year earlier that had been on her heart was now becoming reality.

"You were the only one who believed in me," she said.

"Really?" I replied, surprised.  I didn't understand. Her dream was not far-fetched; it was just something on her heart that she felt God calling her to do.  All I remember saying is that she could do it; I knew she could!

Unfortunately when she went to others, they weren't so encouraging.  People reminded her that "it had been done before and didn't work," "we've already tried that," and "there are others more qualified who could do the same thing."

It made me sad to hear that.  How hard is it just to encourage somebody? When they have an idea, how hard is it to just say, "I believe in you!"  Apparently it is really hard for some people. I understand; I have been one of those people many times before. As a "realist," not an "idealist," I am the first to think about the many details that can often be overlooked.  But as I get older, I am realizing that what is more important is not being the expert or stating the details involved, but just to believe in other people and support their dreams.  Let God handle the details, and let God show that person what to do next.

I hope and pray that I have more opportunities to encourage people in their dreams.

Two years ago someone did this for me- I told her of my dream to write a book, and she was the first person to say, "I know you can do it, and I will support you no matter what."  It made a huge difference, because every time I feel like giving up, I remember her words.

Today I saw this video on Facebook, and it was so moving that I had to share it.  One person believed that this man could overcome insurmountable obstacles, and that is what helped him to achieve his goal.  Incredible.  Take a few moments to watch this video; it will amaze you!

Living in the Moment

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I was recently talking with a wise friend who shared this with me, and I wanted to pass it on:

"Depression happens when we're living in the past. Anxiety happens when we're living in the future.  We need to live 'present-tense' in the now, fully immersed in whatever it is we're doing."

That statement really rang true for me.  We tend to live either in the past or the future.  For me, it's the future.  I'm continually thinking of things that I need to do, goals I want to achieve, or things that could happen.

Others live primarily in the past, wishing they could change things that happened, or feeling guilty.

It can be hard to live in the present.  Sometimes I feel like I'm living with adult ADHD, barely able to focus on the task right in front of me.  On one hand, I thrive on multi-tasking - but it becomes a problem when I can no longer focus on one thing well.

She went on to say,

"If you're doing dishes, do the dishes (focus on doing that to the best of your ability).  If you're in a conversation, be in the conversation (focus).  If you're doing laundry, do the laundry."  Focus, focus, focus.  For me, when I'm working, I need to work. When I'm mothering, I need to mother well.  When I'm studying, study.  Distractions will never go away, but I can still work on being focused on what is right in front of me. 

If we somehow learned the art of focusing, we could avoid so many spiraling thoughts.  We wouldn't worry so much about what people are thinking about us. We wouldn't dwell on our mistakes as much.  We wouldn't fret about the future so often.  Our minds might just be open enough to hear that still, small whisper of God that longs to speak to our hearts.

Jesus even teaches this concept in Matthew 6:33-34:  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

This video for Ann Voskamp's 1000 gifts illustrates this so well. Take a moment to watch.